Therapeutic Word of the Day: Self-Esteem

“Self-Esteem: Too much is just as harmful as too little. Know your strengths and weaknesses, and go live life.”

Self-esteem is a very important concept to get right. It does not mean you can “do anything you want” and can achieve “any level of success”. I have seen many people tell me they can do anything “they put their minds to”, and laugh to myself every time.

The truth is, there are some things you cannot do. You are not perfect. You are not a God. You have limits. So why do we tell children this lie? Why do we tell them they can do anything when in reality there are many things they will NOT be good at? Because it is politically correct and feels good.

I am sorry, but we all have weaknesses. We need to know what they are and work to live our lives with them. For example, I have a dreadful sense of direction. On an IQ test, I scored 70 on spatial orientation, nearly in the mentally challenged category. How do I compensate for this? It is called a GPS. If I lie to myself and think I am good at it, when, in fact, I am not, I am going to be lost much of the time.

You, your children, and everyone else have limitations. Accepting them helps you to be more productive, and lead to a healthy self-esteem.

Nathan Driskell, MA, LPC
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I’m Nathan Driskell, LPC. Every week in the Spectrum & Screens newsletter I break down what the latest research says about screens, technology, and mental health — in plain language you can actually use.

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